Contra(dictory)
also I hang out here, I guess
Well, hey. As you can tell from my forum profile, I'm a douchebag that goes by the Internet name Tabuu! I'm a professional asshole, but today, I'm here to talk about my other profession: amateur writing.
But not about my own writing.
I'm here to talk about yours.
Well, nobody in particular. I'm not saying I'm a better writer than anybody here, but I just want to give my advice to anybody who happens to want it. This advice is based on the years I've spent writing for Userpedia and other writing outlets- don't go to my FF.net profile, it's all Metal Gear porn. Anyways, lets go over some important subjects.
This is pretty important. Now, if you're just starting off, don't make this a big issue- because you don't know your style yet. That's something you'll find out when you start writing some more. Until then, go with what feels right to you. Always read over what you've written and ask yourself: Do I enjoy this? Would I shell out my money to read more?
If the answer to either one of those is "no", then either your style isn't good, the style you're trying to emulate sucks, or maybe you just aren't doing it right. There's other things you have to good at, too.
Like:
Do you hear that?
No?
Well, I do. It's the sound of people who don't want to learn how much they suck clicking away. Admittedly, my grammar isn't perfect- and I don't consider myself a perfect writer, either- but here's some general rules to go by. Always, always, always space after a period.I used to write like this a lot- isn't it annoying?
There's a cool little trick I learned in one of my English classes a while ago, too- you know when you're listing things with commas, but you also want to describe them? Turns out that this is one of those times that the semicolon becomes useful.
Thing, thing about it; other thing, thing about it; other other thing, thing about it!
Isn't that fucking incredible? Pay attention in your English classes. Don't be an arrogant know-it-all like how I was- you can pick up a few things if you listen.
Now, I'm not going to recite first grade for you, but I am going to remind you about something. Sentence structure is very important. The word "structure" was my subject in that sentence and "is" was my verb. Write in complete sentences. Always. Except when you're taking stylistic license.
Like this.
Make sure to read as you write, too- you'll catch things you didn't notice when you were scribblin'/typin' along. If you're not sure about the grammatical stability of a line, ask somebody that knows what they're doing or run it through your word processors grammar check thing. I use GDocs, which doesn't have that. So it's not something I do.
Also, redundancy bores everybody involved. Everybody involved hates redundancy, which happens to originate from the department of redundancy department, which, in itself, is a very redundant place to be.
Redundant.
THIS ISN'T DONE, 'CAUSE I'M STILL WORKING ON IT AND I'M LAZY AND SHIT. I HOPE YOU FIND IT ENJOYABLE AND HELPFUL, THOUGH.
But not about my own writing.
I'm here to talk about yours.
Well, nobody in particular. I'm not saying I'm a better writer than anybody here, but I just want to give my advice to anybody who happens to want it. This advice is based on the years I've spent writing for Userpedia and other writing outlets- don't go to my FF.net profile, it's all Metal Gear porn. Anyways, lets go over some important subjects.
Style
This is pretty important. Now, if you're just starting off, don't make this a big issue- because you don't know your style yet. That's something you'll find out when you start writing some more. Until then, go with what feels right to you. Always read over what you've written and ask yourself: Do I enjoy this? Would I shell out my money to read more?
If the answer to either one of those is "no", then either your style isn't good, the style you're trying to emulate sucks, or maybe you just aren't doing it right. There's other things you have to good at, too.
Like:
Grammar
Do you hear that?
No?
Well, I do. It's the sound of people who don't want to learn how much they suck clicking away. Admittedly, my grammar isn't perfect- and I don't consider myself a perfect writer, either- but here's some general rules to go by. Always, always, always space after a period.I used to write like this a lot- isn't it annoying?
There's a cool little trick I learned in one of my English classes a while ago, too- you know when you're listing things with commas, but you also want to describe them? Turns out that this is one of those times that the semicolon becomes useful.
Thing, thing about it; other thing, thing about it; other other thing, thing about it!
Isn't that fucking incredible? Pay attention in your English classes. Don't be an arrogant know-it-all like how I was- you can pick up a few things if you listen.
Now, I'm not going to recite first grade for you, but I am going to remind you about something. Sentence structure is very important. The word "structure" was my subject in that sentence and "is" was my verb. Write in complete sentences. Always. Except when you're taking stylistic license.
Like this.
Make sure to read as you write, too- you'll catch things you didn't notice when you were scribblin'/typin' along. If you're not sure about the grammatical stability of a line, ask somebody that knows what they're doing or run it through your word processors grammar check thing. I use GDocs, which doesn't have that. So it's not something I do.
Also, redundancy bores everybody involved. Everybody involved hates redundancy, which happens to originate from the department of redundancy department, which, in itself, is a very redundant place to be.
Redundant.
THIS ISN'T DONE, 'CAUSE I'M STILL WORKING ON IT AND I'M LAZY AND SHIT. I HOPE YOU FIND IT ENJOYABLE AND HELPFUL, THOUGH.
