Make a Smash Taunt

Mags

This guy has high hopes for Brothership! :D
Pronouns
He/him
MarioWiki
Magolor04726
For those of you who don't know what a Smash Taunt is, it's when, in the Smash Bros. series, a specific character on a specific stage clicks the down taunt button for the length of one frame. Doing so will cause the character to do something (Pit prays, Snake puts his finger to his ear, and Fox, Falco, and Wolf get down and jab their arm up and down rapidly) for about five seconds. Then, a conversation starts with the character and a few others from the character's series. Currently, only three series can do this.

1. The Star Fox crew, on select stages, where the SF crew usually gives basic instructions on the games, or just a funny conversation.
2. Snake, in Shadow Moses Island, where Mei Ling, Otacon, and Colonel Cambell talk about the origins of the opposing character, along with a couple tips.
3. Pit on Palutena's Temple, where Palutena and Viridi talk about how to beat the character… usually.

Depending on the character, the conversation usually changes. However, this feels very… limiting. For example, Snake's Codec only works with character's who were present in Brawl, since the voice lines were ripped straight from the game. And, for whatever reason, Palutena's Guidance only applies to base characters (and Piranha Plant). No DLC. That's what this thread fixes. Make up a new Smash Taunt conversation, or make up a new series altogether! I thought that it would be neat if Doc Louis helped Little Mac out in Boxing Ring, so I came up with this.

Little Mac: All right Doc, who's this challenger?
Doc: Hah! If you don't know son, you may have been hit a little too hard in that last fight! That's Mario.
Little Mac: Oh yeah, him. Does he have any weaknesses?
Doc Louis: Well, he's pretty fast, and he has some decent moves. He's your standard fighter, nothing too special. Just watch out for his Cape. If he touches you with that thing, you'll get all turned around, and it leaves you wide open for some real pain.
Little Mac: Got it.
Doc Louis: All right, go get 'em, Mac!

What have you got? (Limit yourself to existing series for Smash Taunts, but do whoever you want for the fighter being discussed!)
 
Pit: Who's that ugly guy?
ShyHo: That's Darksyedephil, or Phil Burnell.
Pit: So you essentially just put random people into Smash....
ShyHo: Shut up! Anyways, he's really bad at the game, his horrible commentary deals some damage though. Only one thing though, his attacks are weak and awful!
Pit: Neat.
ShyHo: He's a joke character.
DSP: Fuck you. You talk shit about me, fucking piece of shit.
ShyHo: Oh god, get outta here!
 
Pit: Who's that ugly guy?
ShyHo: That's Darksyedephil, or Phil Burnell.
Pit: So you essentially just put random people into Smash....
ShyHo: Shut up! Anyways, he's really bad at the game, his horrible commentary deals some damage though. Only one thing though, his attacks are weak and awful!
Pit: Neat.
ShyHo: He's a joke character.
DSP: **** you. You talk **** about me, ******* piece of ****.
ShyHo: Oh god, get outta here!
That's... not what I intended...
 
*Mega Man does the taunt*
Mega Man: Who is he, doctor?
Roll: You meant "she"?
Mega Man: "She"? Ok, who is she, Doctor?
Dr. Light: Her name is Samus. She's an intergalactic bounty hunter. Her attacks are strong, you better be careful. Make sure she can't charge up her blaster!
Mega Man: Thanks, doctor.
 
would be nice if paper mario was a dlc character and maybe theyd add one of those in the paper mario stage, where the enemies get tattled by goombario/goombella.
 
i dont have my own ideas BUT. a while back i found a whole ol reddit thread with grunty smash taunts and its literally the best
some highlights:
FredChocoBear said:
Snake, Snake, but you don't slither
As we talk, your HP withers
Don't know what's flatter, tut tut tut
Your personality or your butt?

[my own note: the next one is from another reply]

The dastardly King is back to fight
After 15 years with no spotlight!
His comeback isn't so grand- the cruelest thing here
Is the effect this crocodile has on my eyes, oh dear!
2WaterGuns said:
Mario Mario, you twice-named plumber,
Your personality makes me want to slumber!
Just fireballs and uppercuts, your moves are a bore,
Barely changed since the N64!
Twilord_ said:
Bayonetta:

One witch to another,
I hate how your sales suffer.
Take advantage of the your grand third installment,
Or wind up like me: old, ragged, and insolvent.
DigRatChild said:
Mewtwo:
The psychic cat strikes back once more,
Starred in 3 movies, yet still a bore!
His powers are mystic, his wit is cold,
But he still got caught by a 10 year old!

Captain Falcon:
Though I've heard this lout is hunting bounty
He's not even known within his county!
His moves are shown in a blinding rage,
Probably cause his last game was from the Stone Age!
whotheactualfuckamI said:
So small, so tiny, so Little Mac
Sent off the stage by a misguided attack
Maybe you'd have survived if you were lighter
What was it Doc said? You ain't no air fighter!
sandwichsupernova said:
You're not really Mega, and definitely not a Man / You've got more in common with a tuna fish can / Can't you win a battle without someone else's stuff? / Are those little things lemons? Boy, you sure are tough!
Nintendrome said:
FALCO
I see another mouthy bird
Who drives a scrap heap -- it's absurd!
I could set you with a date
It'd slow my rival -- it would be great.
what_lions_i_hunted said:
Donkey Kong:
He's the loser of the bunch, I'll bet he smells. If he faces me, I'll ring his bell! His coconut gun is not in this game. He's got a thick skull, and a silly name! He's weaker, slower, and dumb as poo. This lumbering oaf belongs in a zoo!
MajorasAss said:
Captain Falcon, what a joke! His series has gone up in smoke! He catches bounties 'cuz he's broke! You just feel awfully sad for the bloke!
Reiizm said:
That butt-chin looks mighty fine! I'd date you if your farts weren't worse than mine.
It_is_Waluigi_Time said:
Daisy:
"Do my eyes deceive me, or has Peach gone orange?
No, wait, I was wrong, it's only...err...*cuts herself off, starting again*"

"Oh look there, it's Princess Daisy,
acting rather deranged and crazy.
I know you not from glory or fame,
but rather 'coz all you do is spout your name!"
 
Paper Mario stage, Mario does the taunt
Challenger: Meta Knight
Goombario: Let's see...
Goombella: It's Meta Knight.
Goombario: The leader of the Meta Knights, he is fast attacking and escaping. Galaxia, his sword, is a legendary weapon only wielded by this Star Warrior.
Goombella: Watch out for his Mach Tornado. He'll spin and attack you multiple times. His dimensional cape lets him escape your combos, so watch out!
Goombario: Your best option is to keep him off the stage as much as you can.
Goombella: You're all set now!
 
Pit: These guys look like they walked straight out of an anime.
Palutena: Those are the Heroes.
Viridi: Hmph. How original. Most of the roster is composed of nothing but heroes.
Palutena: Well, they all have their own names and titles, too. Luminary, Arisu, Solo, and Eight.
Viridi: Eight? The guy's name is Eight? Well, at least he knows how to take care of small creatures, so that's a point in my book.
Pit: They move pretty similar to Link.
Palutena: A sword and a shield is pretty typical adventure equipment. But watch out, their swords can land critical hits, knocking you back even if you have low damage!
Palutena: What's more, they can charge up fire, lightning, and wind spells. And they have a selection of other spells to choose from, like one that can reflect your arrows and another that can put you to sleep!
Pit: You mean these guys have access to their own set of Powers? How do I fight that?!
Viridi: Don't worry. While the Heroes may sound powerful, they're also incredibly predictable. Their moves take time, so stay on your toes and look for openings.
Palutena: The Heroes also have a magic limit, so when it's depleted, that's your chance to come in and strike!
Pit: It sure would be useful if I could use my Powers in this game.
 
Banjo: Hey Kazooie, check it out!

Kazooie: What is it Banjo? I'm trying to sleep here!

Banjo: It's Mario, the legendary plumber!

Kazooie: Isn't that the guy that stole all the attention from us back in the 90s?

Banjo: Oh yeah... he seems nice.

Kazooie: LET'S GET EM!
 
Little Mac: That ape looks familiar, Doc.
Doc Louis: That's Donkey Kong. You've fought him before, remember?
Little Mac: Oh, yeah, now I remember.
Doc Louis: He's pretty powerful son, but his attacks can leave him wide open. Use this to your advantage!
 
Pit: Hey, I know that guy! It's Waluigi!
Palutena: He finally got promoted from Assist Trophy to Fighter!
Viridi: Pah-lease. He's the worst.
Waluigi: You're not too hot yourself, lady.
Pit: Huh?
Viridi: Hey!
Palutena: Wha-
Pit: I thought mortals couldn't hear Palutena and Viridi!
Waluigi: When will you people learn that Waluigi is no mere mortal? (Waluigi then instantly wins and causes the game to crash from his amazingness.)

OK, now for a real one.

Doc Louis: Watch yourself Mac! This swordsman is not someone to be handled lightly!
Little Mac: Why's that?
Doc Louis: His sword can pack a mean punch. He also uses lots of other weapons like arrows, boomerangs, and bombs.
Little Mac: I can't compete with that range!
Doc Louis: Maybe not. But his up close attacks are mostly slow, so if you can dodge the projectiles, you can give still get the KO.
Little Mac: Got it.
 
Pit: Hey, I know that guy! It's Waluigi!
Palutena: He finally got promoted from Assist Trophy to Fighter!
Viridi: Pah-lease. He's the worst.
Waluigi: You're not too hot yourself, lady.
Pit: Huh?
Viridi: Hey!
Palutena: Wha-
Pit: I thought mortals couldn't hear Palutena and Viridi!
Waluigi: When will you people learn that Waluigi is no mere mortal? (Waluigi then instantly wins and causes the game to crash from his amazingness.)
The ballad of wallelujah was not a mere meme.
 
Pit: Woah!
Palutena: Woah is correct, Pit. That's Crash Bandicoot, crate smasher and Cortex basher.
Pit: Cortex?
Palutena: Crash was a failed experiment created by Cortex to lead his Cortex Commandos.
Viridi: THAT VILE FIEND!
Palutena: Fortunately, Crash was rejected and escaped Cortex Castle and landed on an N.Sanity Beach, where he set to save his girlfriend, Tawna.
Pit: Aww... could I get some fighting tips? Please?
Palutena: Be careful for his Death Tornado Spin, it packs a punch. Also look out for his Belly Flop, which you can punish by dodging.
 
Doc Louis: You remember her, don't you Mac?
Little Mac: Of course. She was the welcoming committee when I joined Smash.
Doc Louis: Yep. That's Samus. That arm cannon of hers not only fires projectiles, but it can cause explosions and it's pretty heavy hitting up close too. Strike fast and first, and be sure to utilize your counterattack if you get up close!
Little Mac: Just like Aran Ryan?
Doc Louis: Just like Aran Ryan, baby!
 
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