I spread seeds of distrust across the land, instantly dissolving any current or future alliances. Epic Nitwit and those with which he shared the throne fight one another to the death, and I erase the memory of the surviving individual and send him/her to the bottom of the Mariana Trench.
I throw a hammer at Luigi Bandicoot, causing him to fall into a pool of lava.
I throw an early release copy of Mario Kart 7 right at your head. With your available Nintendo 3DS, you find yourself even more addicted to it than you did with SM3DL. Your Chuck Norris leaves due to boredom.
So the 3DS is a bomb, hm? We get another 3DS and shove it down your throat, causing you to blow up as well. Don't worry, we locked up the entire stock of 1-UPs from the Kingdom, so you cannot revive yourself that way.
We use our Mushroom Hammers (http://www.mariowiki.com/Mushroom_Hammer) to repeatedly hit you until you fall unconscious. We throw your unconscious body into the dungeon of Wario's Castle.
My Rainbow Star Powers made me inmune to your hammers.I use a hate potion on you and MagicalToadette! and you are now fighting to death.Meanwhile,I get the throne.
Luckily we set up a bomb under the throne while we were getting our mushroom hammers. Once you take a seat, the bomb activates, and blows you up. Since the throne is invincible, it does get affected as you blast away.