Bowser's Army vs Modern Earth Military

DamirTheDude

DamirTheDude

A Modern Human Soldier to defeat the Shadow Queen!
I know that this might sound really funny and somehow stupid, but heck, I"ll just do it anyways. Kind of cool when I want to know.

Bowser decides to invade Earth so he could expand his empire, since trying by conquering the Mushroom Kingdom isn't good enough as his plan always get sabotaged by the Mario Bros. He also wants to send a little message to the Mario Bros about this as a alternative of revenge. Could he take over the Earth and defeat Earth's armies? "EARTH WILL BE MINE AND WE WILL DEFEAT THEIR PUNY ARMIES!" as a simply quote from Bowser.

All of his forces included. As well as Earth's armies. All governments in the world will band together to stop Bowser and his army. "We will unite and declare war to stop this evil abomination from destroying our world!" from one military solider.

Nuclear power is OK, but our countries frown upon using these weapons on their own land, as to prevent collateral damage, mainly on civilians.. What is your point of view? What are some events that could occur? Your opinions are welcome! :)

Bowser's forces:
All troops and monsters included. (I.e. Magikoopas, Koopa Paratroopas with Bob-ombs, and other troops that are found in Bowser's Army.)
Koopalings and Bowser Jr. included.
Airships
tanks
Battleship

Earth's Army:
All Modern Jets
Modern Troopers with modern rifles
Modern tanks
Modern helicopters
Navies as well.

All set.
 
Fawful said:
It depends. What are bowsers troops?
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Updated my first post. Sorry I did not mention that in my post.
 
Fawful said:
I bet Bowser would win because his troops can come back from the dead, whereas (unless this is the world of COD zombies) Earth troops cannot.
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Unless they can get burnt from fire, then they can be revived. I"ll be ready for them.
 
Bowser's airships are made from wood so jets could take them down pretty easily, considering most enemies can be beaten by being jumped on I see the only threats being the undead troops
 
Two Italian plumbers can take down Bowser's army.

He'd be obliterated if he attacked a fully-stocked IRL military.
 
Bowser's forces:
Tons of fierce monsters and creatures, some that can revive
Koopalings and Bowser Jr.
Airships, Tanks, and Battleships

VERSUS

Earth's Army:
All Modern Jets, Modern Troopers with modern rifles, Modern tanks, Modern helicopters, Navies as well., Nukes <- None of this matters
A large amount of plumbers

Oh welp looks like earth wins, hands down.
 
Is this even a serious discussion?

Literally the only elements that could possibly be in Bowser's favor are that 1. he has magic, which Earth does not, and 2. if he has that laser UFO from Super Mario Galaxy. But that's it.

Earth infantry would easily smash the Goombas, Koopas, Parakoopas, even Lakitus. Turtle shells can't stop bullets.

I'm not sure what machinery the Monty Moles could cook up, but I doubt it would be anything that could stand up to Earth cruise missiles.

Earth's air forces would be able to take out any hard target from miles away, and the airships wouldn't last long either, unless they have some sort of missile countermeasure system. Considering how easy it was to throw Bullet Bills back at them in SMG, I doubt it.

And of course, as a last resort, Earth has thermonuclear weapons. That would easily wipe out anything Bowser could possibly muster, unless magic (which is always a unknown) has a defense against nuclear weapons and/or radiation. Even that UFO thing wouldn't be able to withstand the nuclear firepower that the US or Russia could bring to bear.

Conclusion: Earth wins. By a lot.

I will say that this is the most interesting thread I've seen in a long time though.
 
Are you all missing the point?

Bowser can be easily defeated by two fat plumbers.

We have a lot of plumbers.

We don't even need to bring out the big guns, Bowser's army is pathetic!
 
Tentomon said:
Are you all missing the point?

Bowser can be easily defeated by two fat plumbers.
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I've never seen Wario and Mario beat Bowser together. Usually, Luigi gets involved.

Mario isn't an ordinary plumber, though. I've never seen a plumber that jumps 10 feet high and has such a huge head.

How do you know if turtle shells can't withstand bullets? And explosions? Pffft. Bowser fell into lava countless times, so you think a some hot blast is going to destroy him? And remember, according to cartoon physics, you can't get scorched by lava even if you stand close to it. Bowser's surrounded by this stuff daily.
 
Tentomon said:
Bowser can be easily defeated by two fat plumbers.

We have a lot of plumbers.
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But can our plumbers jump as high as Mario and Luigi can? I doubt it. that point was already made
Mario Party X said:
How do you know if turtle shells can't withstand bullets?
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Because Koopas can barely withstand watermelon seeds in Yoshi's Island.
Mario Party X said:
And explosions? Pffft. Bowser fell into lava countless times, so you think a some hot blast is going to destroy him? And remember, according to cartoon physics, you can't get scorched by lava even if you stand close to it. Bowser's surrounded by this stuff daily.
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Perhaps Bowser has some sort of fireproof ability, but the Koopas definitely don't, considering they are killed by Bullet Bills in Super Mario Galaxy.

And a thermonuclear device would release way, way more energy than lava. Being fireproof doesn't make you disentegration-proof, or vaporization-proof. Unless it's magic. Like I said, magic is a variable that I can't account for with Earth physics.
 
Do you know the special properties of watermelon seeds? Maybe the guys in Mushroom Kingdom call it watermelon seeds, but in Earth, they're bullets that can also grow into explosive watermelons. You know explosive oranges in Donkey Kong games? Yeah...

Well, magic does things. Bowser did get involved in an explosion in the ending of Super Mario Galaxy. Explosions from a star make thermobombs look like popcorn in a microwave...
 
bowser's army wouldn't fight the earth military

bowser's forces would attack the mushroom kingdom, and then the USA would show footage of the attack and say "SEE, THIS IS PROOF THE ATTACKS ARE REAL" while neglecting to mention the attacks were carried out by bowser's forces, not peach's forces, and then the USA would continue to aid bowser's forces to overtake the mushroom kingdom
 
My question is how the heck can Earth aid Bowser to take over Mushroom Kingdom?
 
Mario Party X said:
My question is how the heck can Earth aid Bowser to take over Mushroom Kingdom?
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well, bullet bills would have been banned 100 years prior, so if the USA didn't attack the mushroom kingdom, they wouldn't be enforcing the bullet bill ban. all they would need to do is convince the american people that peach carried out the bullet bill attack, not bowser, and john kerry would cite peach's bullet bill stash and say the USA won't attack the mushroom kingdom if peach gets rid of all her bullet bills

i think at that point peach would agree to give her bullet bill stash to russia but then john kerry would probably say he was being rhetorical and obama should attack the mushroom kingdom anyway.
 
Mario Party X said:
Tentomon said:
Are you all missing the point?

Bowser can be easily defeated by two fat plumbers.
Click to expand...
I've never seen Wario and Mario beat Bowser together. Usually, Luigi gets involved.

Mario isn't an ordinary plumber, though. I've never seen a plumber that jumps 10 feet high and has such a huge head.
Click to expand...
I come from a family of plumbers and one of the questions on the exam is how high you can jump
 
Mario Party X said:
Do you know the special properties of watermelon seeds? Maybe the guys in Mushroom Kingdom call it watermelon seeds, but in Earth, they're bullets that can also grow into explosive watermelons. You know explosive oranges in Donkey Kong games? Yeah...
Click to expand...
Those watermelon seeds clearly did not move at the velocity of bullets, hence they would not have nearly the same penetration force.
Mario Party X said:
Well, magic does things. Bowser did get involved in an explosion in the ending of Super Mario Galaxy. Explosions from a star make thermobombs look like popcorn in a microwave...
Click to expand...
I didn't think magic caused the explosion. Rather, magic from the Grand Star had built that superplanet, and when Mario took the Grand Star, the magic ceased to support the superplanet, causing it to collapse on itself and create the black hole.
 
Giovanni said:
Mario Party X said:
Tentomon said:
Are you all missing the point?

Bowser can be easily defeated by two fat plumbers.
Click to expand...
I've never seen Wario and Mario beat Bowser together. Usually, Luigi gets involved.

Mario isn't an ordinary plumber, though. I've never seen a plumber that jumps 10 feet high and has such a huge head.
Click to expand...
I come from a family of plumbers and one of the questions on the exam is how high you can jump
Click to expand...
lol
 
Dr. Javelin said:
Mario Party X said:
Do you know the special properties of watermelon seeds? Maybe the guys in Mushroom Kingdom call it watermelon seeds, but in Earth, they're bullets that can also grow into explosive watermelons. You know explosive oranges in Donkey Kong games? Yeah...
Click to expand...
Those watermelon seeds clearly did not move at the velocity of bullets, hence they would not have nearly the same penetration force.
Mario Party X said:
Well, magic does things. Bowser did get involved in an explosion in the ending of Super Mario Galaxy. Explosions from a star make thermobombs look like popcorn in a microwave...
Click to expand...
I didn't think magic caused the explosion. Rather, magic from the Grand Star had built that superplanet, and when Mario took the Grand Star, the magic ceased to support the superplanet, causing it to collapse on itself and create the black hole.
Click to expand...
You know, maybe watermelon seeds, when they collide, blast things on impact. Maybe they pack an explosive that goes off if they collide, which is how enemies fly offscreen when they get hit.

I didn't think magic caused the explosion either, but you probably read it as that because of my poor sentence structure. I meant that anything that's strong enough to explode and then immediately create a black hole is probably trillions of times stronger than a thermonuclear bomb going off. And, somehow, Bowser survived it.

ITT: People overthinking things.
 
I thought Bowser only survived that because the universe was re-created, not because he's invincible. Mario and all the Lumas (and everything in the entire vicinity) would have been destroyed utterly if the Lumas hadn't rebuilt everything.
 
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