i need help.

Mintiously

Mintiously

Prince of LOUD.
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i got accepted into a junior high. granny wants me to change everything about me, and only like 2 people from my old school will come to my new one.

i'm afraid.

you all know me as that happy-go-lucky girl who gets depressed sometimes and can make friends with everyone. surely i can't be shy, can i?

wrong.

i just...

i can't lose my friends. elementary is going by too fast, and after i'm done...

...they leave my life forever.


what do i do?
 
one of my best friends left to a different high school. i haven't lost her forever.

i got her email, i got her phone number, i got a way of texting her, i hang out with her semi-frequently, it's not over if you have to transfer, this is a good age for keeping in touch with faraway friends
 
Yeah, as Stargazing said, there's fortunately many, many ways to stay in touch- text, email, etc. I'm assuming you're new school isn't like 500 miles away from your old school, so you can always hang out with them. Even if you're too far to be with them often, they're plenty of ways (through social media and the like) to keep in touch. For example, I've got boarding students at my high school from like the other side of the world, but they're just fine.

Not to mention with your personality, you'll make new friends on top of your old ones really fast.
 
Like Star said, keep contact with them. I haven't personally seen Anthony for almost a year, but we talk via text every now and then. We're still friends, probably just because we text each other.
 
Do they have a phone? Facebook is a thing too, and they can be messaged through there.

If it makes you feel better I had to leave all my friends when I started middle school too.
 
If there really isn't anything you two can do to continue communicating, you could try telling your parents and/or asking them to tell their parents about you wanting to stay friends, and I'm sure they'd be able to work something out.

I had to leave all of my friends in grades 5 and 8, so you aren't alone.
 
everyone has to change schools at some point. you have to have some way of keeping in touch with them - like, even letters. all you need is an address and then boom.

also you're going to make new friends anyway, i'm sure
 
Ignore your grandmother - she's dumb to tell you to change.

My friends went to different high schools, and then in university we were all in different cities; I don't use social media, but we kept in contact via phone and periodic get-togethers for birthdays and just-because dinners and whatnot.

I'm not very outgoing socially and started out with no friends in my middle school class, but eventually I made one good friend by chance, and became friends with her friends. In high school, people were generally pretty nice and I made a couple acquaintances early on, and then a couple circles of friends naturally evolved as those of us with similar interests sat together in class, worked on projects together, etc. In university, I made friends with a couple people I sat next to in one class or another, or people in my lab groups, if we happened to get along (but then there was no chemistry with other seat/lab mates, and so, we didn't associate outside of class - simple as that).

Long story short, when you're surrounded by people in school, you'll naturally run into folks with shared interests as you do groupwork or kill time between classes, and friendships will grow out of some of those connections. The first couple months will probably be lonely and isolating, but just try to talk to people and be a good work partner, rather than agonizing over not having insta-friends all around you, and it'll make things easier until the connections start to form. Remember that a lot of the other kids will be in the same position as you and are looking for new chums as well.
 
new schools suck but there are tons of clubs and stuff u can join where u can meet ppl who have the same interests as u!

but whatever you do dont join a club called 'builders club' cuz you dont build chairs and woodwork stuff, you 'build your self esteem' and it ruined my life

and if u ever join chess club and they say 'if youre new stay in the room ,if you arent new go to the library' and then since you are new to chess club you stay in the room but then they start telling you what a pawn does and you are like 'oh no they meant new to chess chess not new to chess club i know what a pawn does oh no' and then you end up quitting chess club after that first meeting

uh besides that i guess just dont wear all black every day
 
TELL GRANDMA TO GO CHEW A LAMPPOST

this is your life, and you can do it your way

don't let anyone tell you otherwise


i hate it when people try to change other people's lives, as if it's theirs to control
 
Walkazo said:
Ignore your grandmother - she's dumb to tell you to change.
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Leonardo DiCaprio's Oscar said:
TELL GRANDMA TO GO CHEW A LAMPPOST

this is your life, and you can do it your way

don't let anyone tell you otherwise


i hate it when people try to change other people's lives, as if it's theirs to control
Click to expand...

To be fair... it's natural for parents/grandparents to wish the best education for their children, so I find it slightly heartbreaking to see such negative reactions. Let's look at this from another angle. Unlike other stories people have shared, in your case, your guardians clearly care about you, that is all. Otherwise, they wouldn't bother spending the energy to deal with all this (school transfers require a lot of paperwork; nobody wants to deal with that unless there's a clear intention). Sometimes, even loving guardians aren't perfect. You're grandma may not see the issues that affect you socially, or she may value education more. Either way, the intent is surely not to control you with an iron fist.

Honestly, education is extremely important. Your first 20 years will shape the rest of your life. If you don't grab the opportunity, it's gone forever. Your friends will never go away. In this day and age, keeping in touch with friends has never been easier.

Just remember that your grandma's intention is good, no matter how illogical it may seem. And if you are truly against switching- like, doing so would ruin you're life, then I'm sure they'll let you have the final call. They love you. Don't ever forget that.
 
Andymii said:
Honestly, education is extremely important. Your first 20 years will shape the rest of your life. If you don't grab the opportunity, it's gone forever.
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Whilst education is important, it really doesn't shape your entire future. Neither does the first 20 years of your life, at least not in England.

The amount of presentations we had in school from people who got degrees in something, and did something entirely different; or people who dropped out at school aged 16 and now own quite successful businesses. We've even had people who told us that they barely look at school grades, but instead judge on a personal common-sense kind of level. It'd be incredibly stupid if your entire life got decided by a few sheets of paper, especially if you screwed one of them up.

And also, this isn't the only chance to get an education, the common age to go to university is 18/19, my sister didn't grab that opportunity, but now that she's 26 she is.

Also, per this thread, Gabby. You'll make new friends at this new school, and as with your old friends there is bound to be someway to keep in contact with them, I highly doubt they don't have phones or computers.
 
The first 10 years of grades don't matter at all even if you want to go to university. There should be an emphasis on simply teaching, rather than ruining childhood with homework and pressure to do well on every test - once you're in the workforce, you don't get tests anymore, you just do your job and learn all the details by using them, not by cramming. It's a stupid system.
 
Andymii said:
To be fair... it's natural for parents/grandparents to wish the best education for their children
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her grandma telling her to change isn't related to her changing schools (i think)
 
Walkazo said:
The first 10 years of grades don't matter at all even if you want to go to university. There should be an emphasis on simply teaching, rather than ruining childhood with homework and pressure to do well on every test - once you're in the workforce, you don't get tests anymore, you just do your job and learn all the details by using them, not by cramming. It's a stupid system.
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I mean, any school that doesn't emphasize social stuff alongside academics isn't a very good school. In my opinion, you need both.
 
i can't change easily. it took me a long time to get accustomed to a carpet in my house. a fucking carpet.
 
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