Mushroom Kingdom Smackdown

Waluigi Time

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Now that Mushroom Kingdom Smackdown has found its footing, I've decided that it's time to open it up to the readers. If you don't already know, Mushroom Kingdom Smackdown is my monthly section in The 'Shroom where two characters from the Mario franchise are chosen to beat the stuffing out of each other.

So now I give you the question - who do you want to see in the ring? But don't just drop someone's name in here and call it a day. Make it interesting! Give some reasoning why you think your character would be an interesting choice. Alternatively, if you like someone else's suggestion, you can throw your support in for them and maybe even add additional points of your own. After the discussion has gone on for two weeks, I'll drop in and let everyone know, but the winners will be kept a secret until the issue releases. Once it comes out, I'll make a new post signaling the beginning of suggestions for the next issue, along with any specific theming I have in mind.

If you're not feeling particularly inspired, I will also be providing three nominations of my own every month that you can vote for by simply leaving a reaction on the post. The more reactions a character gets, the more likely it is that they will appear in the issue. You can also support a pre-picked candidate with a post of your own, which will count as several reactions in support of that character.

Guidelines
  • If your suggestion doesn't win, you're encouraged to nominate them again (as long as you still want to see them get in, of course). I'll keep previous suggestions in mind as backups if necessary, but suggestions from the current cycle will always take priority.
  • Characters aren't disqualified just because they've been used before. If you think a previous fighter deserves a second chance or the opportunity to defend their title, go for it!

 
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Many challengers face off in the Mushroom Kingdom Smackdown arena, and many fall... But what makes a good contender? Is it agility, the speed and stamina to outmaneuver your foes and keep them from landing a hit on you while you swoop in for the kill? Is is a strong defense, letting you get shaken, rattled, and rolled without fear? Is it a powerful weapon you can crush your enemies with?

Why not all three?

Behold, the Spiky Parabuzzy! Give this contender with the heart of a champion and the body of a fighter a chance in the ring, and you'll see just what this turtle-that's-definitely-not-a-beetle can do. Try and hit it? Whoops, it's wings and small body mean it's already out of range. If you do hit it? Good luck cracking that tough, fire-resistant shell - that is, if you don't hurt yourself on its spike. Maybe you could use technology or magic to bring it down, cover its eyes with graffiti, wrap it in vines to hold it in place, teleport it down to the ground and expose its soft underbelly... But if you aren't packing fancy tricks, this think will ram you with a shellshock spin and jab into you with a spike while you're struggling to even leave a mark.
 
Maybe every three months, you can have the victors from the previous rounds compete? Or maybe once a year the victors can go full out Smash Bros. on each other.
 
People like to talk about organic Mario enemies that do their best to block your path, however, there are unsung heroes in the Mario ensemble that deserve a mention: the inanimate obstacles. They are not only just as persistent and as a potent foe the Mushroom Kingdom has, but they can be deadly and very invulnerable, and they are more than all too happy to power you down without asking you any questions. Therefore, a very pressing question should be: which inanimate obstacles are the most deadly to players, and if they are constructed in a death ring, who would win out?

I have some suggestions. All of them are spiky metal death traps.

Pillar_NSMBW.png

Skewer
Big, bad, and mighty, a giant metallic cast member who has been with us since Super Mario World. Their job is to either impale unwary people at a wide variety of angles. Vertically moving ones have been around since their inception, but horizontally ones have been introduced in New Super Mario Bros. Wii. Not to mention, the aforementioned game has introduced multiple new varieties of Skewers, such as the mega Skewer in World 6 Tower or the super duper long one in World 4 Castle. They used to OHKO you in one blow if they crush you, but now they power you down, the developers have nerfed their ability to cause tension in many players.

SMM-NSMBU-Grinder.png

Grinder
Not to be confused with those monkeys from Yoshi's Island, these saw blades are also introduced in Super Mario World, introduced in the same castle as their pillared-brother, the Skewer. They move along a dotted grid in a set path, and they are able to grind away to power you down. These things can be spin-jumped on safely, however, though they remain to be invulnerable. However, if they are attached to walls and ceilings, they can cut through them, causing the platforms to fall into an abyss. Bigger ones make their debut in New Super Mario Bros. 2, appearing throughout the entire level to impede their progress! While they are not as deadly as Skewers, they are more tricky because they appear more frequently! On a plus side, they also cannot be defeated by Gold Fireballs (but slope slides could defeat them...somehow)!

Chainsaw_SMW.png

Chainsaw
This is the Mario series's answer to the melee weapon found in many more mature games. Despite having similar patterns to a Grinder, relying on rails to catch unsuspecting people, it is not as fortunate to appear in more games as its Grinder sister, appearing exclusively in Super Mario World. However, they are very effective in preventing players to reach the cryptic secret exit in the Cheese Bridge area, making their mention among the spiky death gallery of Mario obstacles worth mentioning.

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Spike Ball
If you need an obstacle that will KO BOTH the player and excessive Bowser Troops, this rolling hunk of death is your answer. It doesn't care if you're a Dry Bones, if you're a Mega Dry Bones, if you're a Piranha Plant, if you're a Brick Block, or if you're Super Mario. It will roll into you, destroy your confidence, and laugh in the end. Of course, it isn't completely infallible, as it falls to Mega Mario and Statue Mario, but it's not like Mario is often seen with those power-ups anyway. These things can also be spawned by Spikes too, but they don't last quite as long as they get destroyed if those hit a wall. The fun really begins more when Giant Spike Balls enter the picture...
 
Maybe every three months, you can have the victors from the previous rounds compete? Or maybe once a year the victors can go full out Smash Bros. on each other.
I don't know, since there's only new matches once a month I'd prefer to avoid returning characters (especially with that much frequency) unless people really want to see them back and I think I can do something interesting with them. Plus there's only so much you can do with certain characters, so if their fighting style doesn't change at all regardless of who they're fighting and the only difference is whether or not they win or lose, that's not really as fun to write and I imagine not very fun to read either.

Not necessarily opposed to the "winner battle royale" idea, though I personally find it more fun (and easier) to analyze and write 1v1s which is why I started the section in the first place.
 
We all know who we want, see?

Get me some Popple action.
 
Ooh neat, it's like an elaborate Mario themed game of Superfight, I dig it.
I was literally thinking of making Superfight a 'Shroom section.
 
I will request a fight between BUMPTY and CLUCKBOOM. It's fight versus flight! I guess? One is a diddly little penguin that bumps! The other one is a clumsy flying blob that drops bombs! Which will prevail? Perhaps Waluigi Time will have the answer.
 
(And now, Mags' tagline style suggestions...)

Fawful has fury!

Dry Bones rises from the grave!

Rabbid Mario BWAAAAAAH's into first!

Colonel Pluck crushes the competition!

Toad breaks free!

(More to come, probably)
 
I'd like to see Mr. I have a go. Why Mr. I, you may ask? Because he's quite a peculiar enemy. A single eye that cannot move, capable of a single attack. This makes him an unconventional and bizzare character, and would likely make an interesting inclusion in Mushroom Kingdom Smackdown.
 
*please read this in a fast paced southern accent
LISTEN UP LISTEN UP
LADIES AND GENTLEMAN BOYS AND GIRLS I BRING TO YOU THE FUTURE CHAMPION OF THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM SMACKDOWN
FRESH OFF HIS MAIN EVENT WIN AT JEWELRY LAND SUPERSLAM
THAT'S RIGHT I'M TALKING ABOUT THE ONE THE ONLY THE TRUE LEGEND OF OUR SPORT
OCTOPOT
WEIGHING IN AT 435 POUNDS
MADE OF ONLY THE FINEST CERAMICS
FULL OF ONLY THE FINEST OF CEPHALOPODS
BOASTING A TRULY IMPRESSIVE 135-0 RECORD
THAT'S RIGHT 135 WINS 0 LOSSES
HE'S NEVER BEEN PINNED
NEVER BEEN SUBMITTED
NEVER BEEN SMASHED
HE IS UNPINNABLE
UNSUBMITABLE
UNSMASHABLE
HE'S COUNQUERED JEWELRY LAND, BOWSER LAND, AND SARASALAND
AND NOW HE'S COME HERE LADIES AND GENTLEMAN BOYS AND GIRLS TO TAKE ON ALL COMERS IN THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM SMACKDOWN
SO BRING ON ANY CHALLANGER THAT'S RIGHT I SAID ANY CHALLANGER LADIES AND GENTLEMAN AND I ASSURE YOU OCTOPOT WILL SMASH THEM LIKE LINK SMASHING A POT!
 
(Here's a few more ideas)

Phantom of the Bwahpera Hogs the Spotlight!

(OK, it's only one, but I would LOVE seeing Phantom here!)
 
Suggestions for Issue 169 are now open! Once again there's no theme this time, anything goes. (Also, be sure to read the latest issue if you haven't!)

Also, a quick word about repeat suggestions: I will always prioritize this cycle's nominations. If you still want to see someone you suggested last time, don't be afraid to nominate them again! And remember, explaining why you think they would be a good choice gives them a much better chance of getting into the match.
 
I knew it! I knew we had a champion here! Our fighter is going to go straight to the top, straight to the top, you hear?!

But, hey, I hear there's more talent in obscure corners out there. Some really unexpected faces. That's why, this month, I'm dropping a hot tip about an up-and-comer by the name of Fattington. Offensive options? This contender doesn't have many of those. They only have one big finisher - flop over on an opponent and crush them. Not as effective as a Whomp, and fails against foes bigger than them, but, hey, it's a good way to close out the fight.

"What chance do they have with only one move?" I hear you asking the question. But, listen, they're defensive powerhouses! Physical blows just can't penetrate all that blubber! They can keep bouncing you around the ring and keep you from getting close. How do you beat an opponent that you can't hurt, and that constantly pushes you away? You don't! These contenders will tire you out before you make a dent in their stamina, and then you're easy pickings when they decide to fatten - er, flatten - you!
 
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"I'm ready to rawk! That's right it's the Rawk Hawk, RAAAWKING after over a decade of training! Fear my strength!"

With arial attacks and muscle to boot, Rawk Hawk is the perfect choice!He even fought the one and only Great Gonzales! Rejecting the Rawk will be your worst mistake, accepting him will RAWK your world.
 
I have two suggestions. One I have made a poem for, the other I have not. So here they are!

Welcome to this world of paper
The hero makes a cameo in mario maker
But the fighter here I am about to mention
He is evil is my discretion
Cause he drains your color! Sucks your life!
Makes you lose your will to fight!
But who is this minion of the black usurper
I'll tell you, we call him slurper.

It's...
Slurp Guy!
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With that straw in his mouth, he'll suck your color like in the poem! But! Does he have the power to defeat a...
Rotten Mushroom!?
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This poisonous piece of work strikes fear into the hearts of toads and plumbers alike! It will follow you for as long as possible, so running will not do anything but wear you out, making you a easy victim.
Both of these fighters are challenging, but the one thing I hope is that one makes it in! And if not, I'll probably try again for 170!
 
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