I had a dream last night where I was driving around my town (I don't even have a license) and the only vehicles on the roads were Dodge Rams. Sound like a cool world to live in
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Progressive insurance ad: Psst, hey [my real first name]!
Me: what
Ad: Bundle your home and auto insurance with Progressive!!
Me: *realizes it's just an insurance ad*
This actually just happened while I was listening to the radio through earbuds. It sounded even crazier because the guy was, like, whispering in my head.
I looked it up and I think I have hypersomnia, I never have been a morning person I guess, I'm constantly struggling to wake up earlier and earlier
Today is the 20th anniversary of NASA's Spirit rover landing on Mars? Pretty cool
Whoops remember my partially abrased finger from last week? Well now I submerged it in paint thinner without thinking. paint thinner is similar to gasoline btw
I just ate a whole jar of Spanish olives in one sitting and I am not ashamed of it
Do you know a sloth and a sabretooth tiger?
Well, you guys voted for a random theme so you got it. This is my first name change ever btw, it felt pretty weird, new year, new me, I guess
Happy new year yall, hope 2024 will be a great year
for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to chop a log in half with a mini hatchet and half an hour later I am thoroughly exhausted, I abrased the skin off of one finger, but I got a cleanly cut log stool out of it
So I got an Xbox controller for my nonexistent Xbox, some moisturizing spa booties, and about 5 days worth of sausages, among other things. not a bad Christmas
Merry Christmas and happy holidays everybody!!! Hope you're getting some rest, spending time with family and friends, and remembering what's important about the Christmas season. Yesterday I found out that babies really like me for some reason and they would literally start crying when I gave them back to their mothers so
. And I'm not sure whether to feel proud or embarrassed that I wrapped my parent's presents in wallpaper
making some festive crack, are we? This was on my Windows news feed. worst possible wording. I would have reported this if it weren't for the picture
I wonder if something... interesting will happen today...
Installing Starlink stuff on a house in sub 20 degrees is Not Fun®
What if all the accounts on the Mario Boards were just sockpuppets of one user and they're just always talking to themselves. Think about it
So I went to Ruby Tuesday's the other day and had some crab legs. Turns out, crabs are dangerous dead or alive, and I ended up leaving that restaurant with at least 3 dinner-inflicted puncture wounds.
Holy frickin cow guys this was quite a day. Town without power for 6 hours, just got it back a few minutes ago
"You can drive us right"
me: "yep"
"You have your driver's license right"
me: "nope but I can still drive you"
how did I consecutively go from a dance music phase to an R&B music phase, to a hip hop music phase, to a country music phase, all within 2 months
hey guys try to pronounce possibilitililititilitilililitilititility
I bet there's no possibility that you can
when you remember you made a bunch of youtube videos with your friends a couple years ago and now they have 15 to 4000 views
is it alarming that Mario's wiki page is part of the "Pages to be deleted" category
sounds like a disaster if you ask me
why did the mario cross the road -
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