Control a Mario

[Sprig]

Congratulations! You are the proud owner of a new MicroMario™!
These automated dolls can listen to and carry out any command! Unfortunately, there was a programming malfunction and they are all faulty.
First, explain how the command the person above you gave failed, starting with "Mario tried, but...".
Next, give your Mario a command, starting with "Mario attempts to..."
They can even interact with other MicroMushroom™ brand toys, such as MicroLuigi™ and MicroToad™!

Here's my command:
Mario attempts to kill a goomba.

 

[Cayde]

Mario tried, but crashed into the ceiling

Mario attempts to make pizza.

 

[Sprig]

Mario tried, but put the pizza in the toaster instead of the oven.

Mario attempts to buy spaghetti.

 

[Cayde]

Mario tried, but got ravioli instead.
Mario attempts to tie my shoes.

 

[Sprig]

Mario tried, but triple knotted and cut off circulation to your foot, making it fall off.

Mario attempts to reattach said foot because I'm feeling charitable today.
Actually I just got an idea for a better version of this lol

 

[kfc]

Mario tried, but he accidentally unattached the other foot as well.

Mario attempts to BLJ through space and time

 

[Wynn Liaw]

Mario tried, but he could not as he was accidentally updated to the Shindou version without even being told to.

Mario attempts to buy Super Mario 3D All-Stars before 1 April, 2021.

 

[Wynn Liaw]

Mario tried, but his speed was changed to 1 millimeter per hour and he could not make it in time to buy the game.

Mario attempts to run faster than Sonic the Hedgehog.

 

[Sprig]

Mario tried, but his speed was changed to 1 millimeter per hour and he could not make it in time to buy the game.

Mario attempts to run faster than Sonic the Hedgehog.

Mario tried, but the devs discovered he was using speed hacks.

Luigi attempts to play Blackjack at the Devil's Casino.

 

[Kirbyo]

Mario tried, but the devs discovered he was using speed hacks.

Luigi attempts to play Blackjack at the Devil's Casino.

Luigi tried, but he ended up being the new main protagonist of Cuphead.
Mario attempts to get rid of joy con drift once and for all.

 

[Cayde]

Mario tried but he lost all of his money

Mario goes to sleep.

 

[The Green Knight]

Mario tried... but never woke up

Mario attempts to eat a toad

 

[Cayde]

It was a Toad shaped pizza.

Toad bakes a cake.

 

[The Green Knight]

Toad tried, but It turned out to be a trapped cake (new super Mario bros.)

Luigi attempts to tie his shoes

 

[Cayde]

Luigi ties his shoes together.

Peach goes on a date with Mario.

 

[The Green Knight]

Peach tries, but ends up captured by bowser

Mario attempts to make an IKEA product

 

[Sprig]

Mario tries, but ends up having an argument with Peach and they nearly divorce.

Mario attempts to do the Mario.

 

[garfeld the cat]

Mario tries, but he performs the Mario dance featured in Just Dance 2018 instead

Mario attempts to play Drawception

 

[Wynn Liaw]

Mario tried, but he confused Drawception with another site and went to that site instead of Drawception.

Mario attempts to remember some things.