Typical Tragedy

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I thought I already told you they're still great and it'll be interesting to see how the Murzon sidestory goes. Also there's a 90% probably of more dreams of Michael's memories, which'll be cool. And that psycho Rudnicki is well, terrifyingly psychotic. But no doubt Zanza is 99% more likely to be even worse in all ways. Oh, and check your UP forum messages if you haven't yet. ;)
 
Review:

Everything went smooth and nice, no big complaints here, and it was small enough that it wouldn't be a drag.

6.9/7

EDIT: May I also request to be a character in the story?
 
David T. Darlton said:
EDIT: May I also request to be a character in the story?
Psh man everyone wants to be in this story.

Also I'm glad to say that this chapter
has been accessed 33 times.
Not quite good enough, but much better. Finally people are starting to pay attention.

(now I shall start adding subconscious messages in my posts to get Tabuu to add me in the story mwahahahaha wow i'm so bad at evil laughs)
 
I'm not going to push you to make me a character but I would like it.

Anyway, good chapter. I don't really like the "Anton joined the party!" thing as it sounds corny but it luckily it doesn't happen too often. There's not much to say as it was an intro chapter but it was well written.
 
The X joined the party! thing is kind of a running gag. Remember when Pantaro joined up?

Hm.

For some reason, this thread makes me want to put Javelin in the story.
 
The story is like an RPG, really.

Part 1
Mini-boss: Pantaro
Mini-boss: Rudnicki
Boss: Murzon

Part 2
Mini-boss: ?
Mini-boss: ?
Mini-boss: ?
Mini-boss: ?
Mini-boss: ?
Boss: ?

Part 3
Mini-boss: ?
Mini-boss: ?
Final Boss: ?

Also note how Murzon was taken on by an entire team- like in an RPG. Battles like that will be frequent in this story.
 
Part 2 - The World of Mini-Bosses

Great. I just loved those levels in Super Mario Galaxy where you fought five bosses in a row.

Maybe you should do a combo battle, like where they fight two of the Subs at once. Or maybe even three.

EDIT: Also heh heh plan successful.
 
Dr. Javelin said:
Part 2 - The World of Mini-Boss

Great. I just loved those levels in Super Mario Galaxy where you fought five bosses in a row.

Maybe you should do a combo battle, like where they fight two of the Subs at once. Or maybe even three.

Boss rushes are always great. And that idea would be pretty cool to see in action, but mightn't it get a little overwhelming for the party?
 
Good, good... You and Smiley make me laugh. Personal reasons, though... hard to explain.

You know, the guy from the nightmares reminds me of Golden Fang when he tried to bring back Chris/Tabuu's memories in Resolutions.

Intended reference, or random whimsical assumption?

Also, I like the idea of the seal, which explains why you didn't have your powers at the beginning. It weaves in well with your statement that power corrupts you.
 
Dr. Javelin said:
Good, good... You and Smiley make me laugh. Personal reasons, though... hard to explain.

You know, the guy from the nightmares reminds me of Golden Fang when he tried to bring back Chris/Tabuu's memories in Resolutions.

Intended reference, or random whimsical assumption?

Also, I like the idea of the seal, which explains why you didn't have your powers at the beginning. It weaves in well with your statement that power corrupts you.
Random assumption. The nightmare guy...well, he isn't necessarily trying to help Tabuu...

Yeah, I figured that if I- news flash- was going to actually start allowing myself to become more of a main character, that I had to highlight my actual flaws, too.
 
Don't Fear said:
Dr. Javelin said:
Good, good... You and Smiley make me laugh. Personal reasons, though... hard to explain.

You know, the guy from the nightmares reminds me of Golden Fang when he tried to bring back Chris/Tabuu's memories in Resolutions.

Intended reference, or random whimsical assumption?

Also, I like the idea of the seal, which explains why you didn't have your powers at the beginning. It weaves in well with your statement that power corrupts you.
Random assumption. The nightmare guy...well, he isn't necessarily trying to help Tabuu...

Yeah, I figured that if I- news flash- was going to actually start allowing myself to become more of a main character, that I had to highlight my actual flaws, too.
> Tabuu will not become a Marty Stu or The Wesley

And there was much rejoicing.

EDIT: I went ahead and updated the Main Page to include Chapter Nineteen, and phased out older chapters.
 
Review:

The flow is great. Characters sound real and emotions can assumed correctly before the story said how they were. Really good chapter.

7/7
 
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