Good wishes aren't always good wishes

But you are a line then, aren't you?

I wish that people would post more often here.
 
Granted, they post so much, this topic explodes

I wish everything in life was highly combustible
 
Granted the air became highly combustible and a random person next to you turned on his lighter, making you both dying in a terrible explosion.

I wish for money.
 
Granted. Chickens would think you're tasty now.

I wish the government would cut military spending
 
Granted, but death wishes come true as well.

I wish it wasn't so stormy here
 
Granted but you lose your legs and your lunch in the process

I wish I can calculate
 
Granted, but all of the languages you learn are incredibly obscure

I wish humans had a higher cold tolerance
 
Granted, but everyone hates you.

I wish romance was nonexistent
 
Granted, but D'Oh you missed and you fall into a pit while screaming, "RUUUHHHHHH!!!"

I wish our trash would explode
 
Granted, but you were aiming for a mountain of dynamite. And you explode randomly.

I wish I was immortal
 
Granted, but unending life becomes horrible and you try to kill yourself, but only to fail.

I wish I could Roundhouse kick like Chuck Norris, with impeccable aim and the sense not to kick at a pile of dynamite.
 
Granted but you just randomly explode

I wish I can drive when I was a baby. And win first place.
 
Granted but you win 1st place at a "pooping in my diapie" contest.

I wish I could kick like Chuck Norris, with impeccable aim, the sense not to kick a pile of dynamite, and the quality not to explode randomly.
 
Granted but I steal your powers and I use it against you

I wish Baby Luigi is real
 
Granted but he is real... and not as good as he acts.

I wish I could kick like Chuck Norris, with impeccable aim, the sense not to kick a pile of dynamite,the quality not to explode randomly, the ability not to have my power used against me.
 
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