Good wishes aren't always good wishes

[Christmas Who?]

Granted, your new name now has to have a number, a symbol, and the noise of a spinning tarantula in it.

I wish Mario Kart 9 was like Crash Team Racing Nitro Fueled.

 

[Princess Viola]

Granted, unfortunately Mario Kart 9 ends up being so similar to Crash Team Racing Nitro-Fueled that Nintendo gets sued for infringement by Activision/Microsoft and has to give them all profits made from the game, withdraw it from sale, and destroy it.

I wish Thomas & Friends: All Engines Go was actually a good cartoon.

 

[Christmas Who?]

Granted, it gets cancelled.

I wish Paul Newman was still alive.

 

[Bugzzy]

Granted, but he is a zombie.

I wish that penguins can thrive in any temperature.

 

[Kerrigan]

Granted, but now humans can only survive in negative temperatures.

I wish I had Mario and Luigi as roommates.

 

[Primarina]

granted, but they both cause chaos with power-ups.
I wish for Miraculous Ladybug to have a Marigami kiss scene.

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, you find yourself without your TV for some reason.

I wish for a copy of Sonic Adventure 2

 

[Kerrigan]

Granted, but it has a game breaking bug that completely bricks your entire console beyond repair.

I wish I didn't have to take economics.

 

[Primarina]

granted, but you have to take Mandarin Chinese
I wish to be a winx club fairy.

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, but I don't know what that is so I turned you into a shadow of yourself instead.

I wish for a DualShock 2.

 

[Bugzzy]

Granted, but it was a bootleg.

I wish to be an inventor as great as Eggman.

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, Eggman decides to smite your ass for some reason.

I wish for Among Us to-

 

[Bugzzy]

You were ejected.

I want bacon.

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, the bacon was cold.

I wish for Tires.

 

[Bugzzy]

Granted, but I got you Scooters instead. (Check out a specific video game thread for help.)

I wish for chalk

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, they break when you touch them.

I wish for a bootleg PS5 known as the GS5.

 

[Bugzzy]

Granted, but it was not a bootleg.

I want a

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, it wasn't an emojii though.

I want a paper.

 

[Princess Viola]

Granted, but you get a bad paper cut.

I wish for an uncorruptable wish.

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, but you yourself get corrupted.

I want a Notification that isn't a Notification.

 

[Bugzzy]

Granted, but it was a notification.

I wish for electric missiles.

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, they blow up in your face.

I want a drink of Dragon blood.

 

[Sweet Snow]

Granted, it burns your insides
I wish to be able to drive

 

[Bugzzy]

Granted, but a car runs over you immediately.

I want Paper Sonic to be real.

 

[Primarina]

granted, but it's literally just a sonic-themed rom hack of paper mario 64.
I wish to be an android, aeon-style.