Good wishes aren't always good wishes

Granted. I start shoving Wario into your face and I'll rename myself "WarioOnFire"

I wish Mario exploded, and there's a new mascot for the series.
 
Granted, but Wario replaces the mascot and Nintendo would go bankrupt.

I wish that fans would like Mario more than Luigi.
 
Granted, but fans like Wario 10million times more than Mario

I wish Baby Luigi appeared in more games so that Nintendo makes AWESOME new game art of him.
 
Granted. Wario is the star of the new games and all game-art of Baby Luigi has Wario's head on where Baby Luigi's head.

I wish that there was a good Nintendo game where you can choose any Mario character you want and torture Wario with.
 
Granted (I really don't feel like corrupting this LOL), but Wario fans will rage and Mario sucks at torturing Wario

I wish Yoshi had his old look again
 
Granted. Now he replaces Baby Luigi in the games.

I wish that Baby Mario can play more roles.
 
Granted, but people will throw tomatoes at him and he'll annoy you.

I wish Peach is the main villain
 
Granted. Now Wario is the main protagonist.

I wish that people would hate Daisy less.
 
Granted, but they hate Mario more

I wish I knew what went inside my food at a restaurant chain
 
Granted. Now you discover that they actually add Wario's radioactive poop and you are so scarred that you do not eat and starve.

I wish that I have a better computer.
 
Granted, but your Wii turns worse

I wish I didn't have ADHD and PTSD
 
Granted. You now have cardiovascular disease.

I wish that I was immortal.
 
Granted, but no one cares about you anymore and you have no special abilities.

I wish Mario was fatter than he already is
 
Granted. Mario gets a billionth of a millimeter fatter while Baby Luigi gets obese like Wario and Nintendo decides that Baby Luigi should be associated with toilet humor.

I wish that Donkey Kong can stop being a donkey.
 
Granted, but he starts being a mule

I wish Wario is the main mascot of Nintendo instead of that fat plumber named Mario
 
Granted. Nintendo goes bankrupt and Sonic replaces all Mario stuff INCLUDING the Mario wiki.

I wish that Waluigi can act like a girly girl.
 
Granted. Waluigi wants to marry you and you're forced against your will

I wish you married Waluigi AND Wario
 
Granted. I die shortly after and you will regret making this wish.

I wish that Wario is your bride.
 
Granted, but he is your bride too

I wish I know how to make animated GIFs
 
Granted. Every computer you touch explodes.

I wish that Mario is green instead of red.
 
Granted, but no one recognizes him anymore

I wish that Baby Luigi can appear in the Fake Mario Show and he's a major character
 
Granted. At the end of every episode, Baby Luigi explodes and Mario devours his soul.

I wish that Nintendo makes a good Mario movie.
 
Granted, but Baby Luigi is the main character of it

I wish that Nintendo would make good jazz music
 
Granted. You can only hear them in Japan.

I wish that people think that Samus is a robot.
 
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