Good wishes aren't always good wishes

[Will Solace]

Granted. You get sent to jail for killing someone for calling you a bad word in a different language.

I wish people would quit saying "Hey gurl" to girls.

 

[Meta Knight]

Granted they start saying "Hey gorls" instead.

I wish for a perfect pizza

 

[Will Solace]

Granted, your standards for pizza become extremely high (you expect every pizza to be as good as the perfect pizza). When none of them satisfy you, you sink into a deep, hopeless depression and kill yourself.

I wish the critics would give Avengers: Age Of Ultron a better rating.

 

[TinTinfinite]

Granted. Infinity War sucks

I wish I can hypersleep.

 

[Will Solace]

Granted, you sleep through a test.

I wish for money.

 

[Paper Iggy Koopa]

Granted. You get robbed.

I wish for Smash 4 DLC

 

[RedShell]

Granted. It adds one new stage which is just a small platform which only 1 character fits on.

I wish I had time to think of a wish.

 

[Lumastar]

Granted. You just made the thread go inactive for over a month.

I wish that I had a magical potato bag that would never empty.

 

[TinTinfinite]

Granted. It's literally a potato bag full of unpeeled potatoes.

I wish I have a Crunchyroll 1-month subscription so I can watch moar Squid Girl.

 

[Xiahou Dun]

Granted.

You end up eating everything that shows Squid Girl for a month.

I wish I could jump really high for some reason.

 

[LN1]

Granted, but the force of the jump will break your legs and you will be even more broken if you fall after that jump.

I wish for socks.

 

[Xiahou Dun]

Granted. They'll eat your feet and force you to sing soprano at the same time.

I wish for a talking swimming pool filter.

 

[Lord Bowser]

granted, it's very rude and always insults you

I wish it started snowing right now

 

[Mintiously]

Granted. The snow blocks your doorway, and the heater stops working. GJ.

I wish for a wish that wishes itself.

 

[Xiahou Dun]

Granted. It gets corrupted anyway, and Warios start spawning near your house.

I wish that Wario could transform into a disgusting pony.

 

[Mintiously]

Granted, that pony is Rarity from FIM.

I wish for a cookie.

 

[Lumastar]

Granted. Upon biting into it you become a life-sized gingerbread man.

I wish that I had the power to fully hypnotize anyone and that my powers cannot miss or affect me.

 

[TinTinfinite]

Granted. It's all a DREAM!

I wish I can hibernate.

 

[Xiahou Dun]

Granted. Once you wake up, you'll start craving tacos and will never eat anything else again.

I wish I had a Lamborghini to wreck.

 

[Lord Bowser]

granted, it's already wrecked when you get it

I wish I was immune to mosquito bites

 

[TinTinfinite]

Granted. You're allergic to immunity.

I wish I have a six-pack.

 

[Mintiously]

Granted. You're allergic to immunity.

I wish I have a six-pack.

Granted, you can never show it to anyone or you'll die.

I wish everybody joined the Splatoon Fad.

 

[Xiahou Dun]

Granted. Future DLC turns Splatoon into a horrible game, and every subsequent Splatoon game becomes forty times worse.

I wish for a snack right now.

 

[Giga12]

Granted. Future DLC turns Splatoon into a horrible game, and every subsequent Splatoon game becomes forty times worse.

I wish for a snack right now.

Granted, it's human flesh Hot Pockets

I wish that Bethesda games were completely bug-free even without mods

 

[TinTinfinite]

Granted. Fallout 4 gets delayed to 2017 and each update of Fallout Shelter gets buggier until your phone crashes.

I wish I can wear a blue tunic + iron boots and breath underwater.