Good wishes aren't always good wishes

[PanchamBro]

Granted...now you can't make a wish.

I wish that Samus was actually an alien.

 

[Teedgee]

Granted, but now Ridley is a woman instead.

I wish for good results at school.

 

[Moldomré]

Granted. They're all in the subjects that you already had good results in.

I wish for peace and good will towards men (and women).

 

[The Lord Bowser]

Granted. But animals are likely to be abundant and very violent to the human race, being the only threat to the humans, often known for destroying human territory.

I wish I was gigantic

 

[Sweet Snow]

Granted but you're too big for any planet and have to just float through space
I wish someone wanted to ask me questions

 

[The Lord Bowser]

Granted but the questions will be dismaying
I wish I was a snowman

 

[PanchamBro]

Granted. You melt cuz I granted your wish in Australia, which is in the middle of spring.

I wish everyone went to The Bad Place

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, only Bubsy goes to The Bad Place.

i pass

 

[PanchamBro]

Granted, you failed.

I wish I made a chocolate chip cookies

 

[YoshiSan]

The "a chocolate chip cookies" were made, but they only had "a chocolate chip" in them. So.

I wish I had a final smash in real life.

 

[J-Yoshi64]

Granted. But you don't have access to a Smash Ball.

I wish I could get my old watch to work again.

 

[Teedgee]

Granted. But it works so well that it goes too fast. It's useless now.

I wish it was the weekend so that I could buy Super Mario Party with my pocket money.

 

[Moldomré]

Granted. It's sold out everywhere.

I wish I had a real pet Yoshi.

 

[PanchamBro]

Granted. It eats you for mistaking you as a fruit.

I wish every holiday didn't exist.

 

[Teedgee]

Granted, now you'll work for the rest of your life since there's no holiday.

I wish for the opposite of the above wish (that it's holiday right now).

 

[PanchamBro]

Granted. Now you have no checks at all.

I wish people knew about Gaikotsu Shotenin Honda-san.

 

[Kerrigan]

Granted, all the people who know about it hate it. Or him. Or her. That sounds like something from an anime and I don't know squat about anime.

I wish my computer would stop overheating.

 

[Teedgee]

Granted, instead, it froze (literally)

I wish for some money (REAL money)

 

[PanchamBro]

Granted. It's a currency that's outdated and can't be used.

I wish the Grinch would just leave me alone.

 

[Princess Céline]

Granted, he will now plague Christmas instead.

I wish for a larger TV

 

[Sweet Snow]

Granted, but it's so big it can't fit in your house

I wish there were more plushes of my favorite character

 

[Sp00kDragon]

Granted, they are all scratched up and you can barely tell it's your favorite character

I wish that I had a famous youtube channel with 1,000,000+ subscribers

 

[Teedgee]

Granted. You do stupid videos and everyone is subscribing to you just for shits and giggles.

I wish the one week long vacation I'm in right now turns into a one month long one.

 

[Sp00kDragon]

Granted, a volcano erupts, and tsunami strikes along with a hurricane, but you can't leave because your vacation is 1 month long.

 

[Teedgee]

I wish Thor would have gone for Thanos' head.