Good wishes aren't always good wishes

[ralphfan]

Granted, but they went out of style over 120 years ago.

I wish for earwax.

 

[SpinyMaster347]

Granted but you get no girls.

I wish for lamps

 

[ralphfan]

Granted, but they smell bad.

I wish for toenails.

 

[Marioguy1]

Granted but they're yours and your toes are missing something...

I wish for ralph's toenails

 

[Nathan Fielder]

Granted, but his toes launch a rebellion and enslave the entire forum...

Can't speak, being enslaved by killer toes...

I wish Marioguy1 became Marioguy1.1.

 

[SpinyMaster347]

Granted but he gets upgraded and kills us all.

I wish for Polices

 

[WaluigiWare]

Granted. They're after YOU.

I wish I had a legit Get Out of Jail Free card.

 

[RealMenOfGenius]

Granted, but so does your archenemy who kills you, after he gets out.

I wish I could make my own Mario game and sell it licensed by Nintendo

 

[SpinyMaster347]

Granted but they sue you.

I wish for the ability to Burgl

 

[ralphfan]

Granted, but you get caught.

I wish the A's could learn to hit the fucking ball.

 

[Nathan Fielder]

Granted, but the ball hits you.

I wish I had a Paratroopa, one that doesn't hate me.

 

[RealMenOfGenius]

Granted, but the paratroopa dies, and the koopa troop thinks you did it. Now they want to kill you.

I wish the Red Sox got a spot in the playoffs this year

 

[ralphfan]

Granted, but they lose to Oakland.

I wish crap didn't smell so bad.

 

[SpinyMaster347]

Granted but you eat it.

I wish for day

 

[ralphfan]

Granted, but there's a solar eclipse, and you look at the sun.

I wish for maple syrup.

 

[SpinyMaster347]

Granted but it's super sticky.

I wish for DK

 

[ralphfan]

Granted, but he stalks you.

I wish for custard.

 

[SpinyMaster347]

Granted but it cusses you.

I wish for granite.

 

[Villain11]

It crushes you. I wish for good health.

 

[ralphfan]

Granted, but you become very ugly.

I wish for potato chips.

 

[WaluigiWare]

Granted. They're stale.

I wish I was handsome...er.

 

[ralphfan]

Granted, but I'm still better-looking than you.

I wish the word "dawg" was removed from the English language.

 

[Zero777]

Granted, it doesn't have to go bad

I wish tomorrow will go by quick

 

[ralphfan]

Granted, but today doesn't.

I wish for more cowbell.

 

[Nathan Fielder]

Granted, but it a splode.

I wish this thread went down the toilet.