Good wishes aren't always good wishes

[UltraMario]

Granted, but I eat it.

I wish I was Mr. Burns.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, but you have every disease known to man, and several known to monkey.

I wish I had my turkey sandwich back, and I want to eat it.

 

[DragonFreak]

I wish to blow up, I mean get big.

*Smirk* Adventure Time reference.

Granted, but you have every disease known to man, and several known to monkey.

I wish I had my turkey sandwich back, and I want to eat it.

Granted, but in that wish, you didn't say it wasn't poisoned again, so it is, and you die.

 

[Magikrazy]

At least it was good. Since you didn't put a wish, I'll do one.

I wish everything I had x-ray vision.

 

[DragonFreak]

Darn, I didn't wish.

Ok, Granted, but you have to see through everything, the good, the awesome, and the emotionally-life-scarring.

I wish I had scales.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, but the scales cut everyone you embrace. Smooth move, Edward Scissorhands.

I wish I had an indestructible DVD of every good show there ever was, ever.

 

[DragonFreak]

Granted, but you watch it for the rest of your life and you die of super obesity. Plus, your electric bill is the highest in the whole world from non-stop TV watching.

I wish knives were harmless.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, the blades have been removed, making it impossible to cut meat. You kept the elderly from eating and they all died.

I wish I had a hat and a corndog.

 

[User4042]

Granted but the corndog is a dog made out of corn.

I wish for apples.

 

[DragonFreak]

Granted, but you either choke on them, or fall asleep until Prince Charming kisses you, whichever one would be more painful.
....................................................

I wish for a theory.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, you get the Grandfather Theory. That means you go back in time, kill your grandfather and cease to exist.

I wish I had a box

 

[User4042]

Granted, it is an empty box

I wish for Applejack

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, your room fills up with Apple Jacks until you drown.

I wish to asplode.

 

[DragonFreak]

I wish I had a box

No way, I was going to wish for that next.

Granted, your room fills up with Apple Jacks until you drown.

I wish to asplode.

Granted, but what happened is too horrifying to say.

I wish for the elimination of all emoticons.

 

[LN1]

Granted, someone thought you meant smileys so there are no more smileys, and the smiley fans kill you.

I wish for the end.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, everyone dies.

I wish my empty box I wished for was full of turkey sandwiches.

 

[Boidoh]

Granted, but you have every disease known to man, and several known to monkey.

I wish I had my turkey sandwich back, and I want to eat it.

Granted, but in that wish, you didn't say it wasn't poisoned again, so it is, and you die.
[/quote]

I wish for bacteria.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, but the bacteria quickly evolves into an invertabrate, a fish, an amphibian, a reptile, a gorilla and finally a human. He no longer fits in the petri dish. You then eat the petri dish. He gives you the Heimlich Maneuver. He then eats you.

I wish this statement was false.

 

[Smashley]

Granted, you explode because i couldn't think of anything better.

I wish for a new Star Fox game.

 

[Brock]

Granted, you explode because i couldn't think of anything better.

I wish for a new Star Fox game.

Granted, but it is the Star Fox version of Other M.

I wish to be a player in the NHL.

 

[DragonFreak]

Granted, but on your first game a puck knocks all of your teeth off, but luckily, you went back out there and one that game. What, why is this bad? Oh yeah, now you have to drink your food.

I wish I wasn't hungry anymore.

 

[Verbal Rhythm]

Granted, you don't feel hunger, forget to eat and die.

I wish I had every Nintendo game.

 

[LN1]

Granted, but they explode.

I wish for a wish to wish for cake.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, your wish comes true and you forever regret not wishing for a wish to wish for cake.

I wish I was on the forum.

 

[LN1]

Granted, you die.

I wish for random diabetes